April 20, 2016

Blog Makeover

I updated some of the descriptions and links to better reflect what I'm actually posting. And what my life is about. I initially said that it's long overdue, and it is, but that's not a kind way to talk to myself.

I've started with links to RA blogs, because that's what I found. There aren't very many people with Undifferentiated Connective Tissue Disease (my most recent diagnosis) to begin with, and most of those aren't much up to writing. I know the feeling. And if you google "autoimmune disease blogs" you get freaking Sarah Wilson boasting that quitting sugar cures everything. Thank you The Katering Show for a proper response!

I'm continuing to reach out to fellow autoimmune folks, locally and online. Meet the Arthritis National Research Foundation's latest #CureArthritis team member :) I'm also making new friends and assembling a support system can actually help support me. As well as hammering it into my head that needing support is healthy and normal.

April 17, 2016

Dumped

I'd been seeing someone since Jan. Things were going well, not fabulously but well. He was sending some mixed signals but stress could've explained that. Until what I thought was our Thursday date night turned out to be me getting dumped.

As far as dumpings go it was ok. There was focus on it not being due to my poor health, his emotional baggage is the issue. Ironically, I'm the healthy one in that respect. But it's been a hard couple weeks. The same night I also heard about a family member's health issue, that's still pending.

I've been thinking a lot lately about my future. It's scary. We're having a beautiful weekend in Seattle and all those thoughts are chasing themselves around my brain. Maybe I can still shower and get out in the sun a little this afternoon. That would be a pleasant distraction.

April 9, 2016

Summer Does Serotonin Syndrome

Well, mild serotonin toxicity is more accurate, but it lacks alliteration. Regardless of the name, still not fun.

A nice simple diagram
On Thursday I got terrible nausea and thought, "hmm, maybe I'm getting a migraine." So I took Compazine and Imitrex, went to neck PT, felt better and went about my day. That evening at a friend's I started to feel weird: stomach-twitchy-butterflies, fuzzy headed, trouble focusing my eyes, and akathisia. I took some meds, slept soundly, all better. Right? Not right.

So Fri and today I still felt weird. Yesterday I slept, then today I finally figured out what the heck was going on. Good news: this is not a new autoimmune symptom. Bad news: it's going to take a bit to wear off. Because a bunch of my meds act synergistically and make each other more toxic (isn't science fun?). And dumping two serotonin-happy meds into the mix is a Bad Idea.

Now I've crossed another unpleasant experience that off my chronic illness bucket list. So that's something ;)


March 19, 2016

Another Blanket

I finished this blanket before New Year's, but my photos were bad. The recipients were kind enough to take more pictures in their non-blue drenched home and I present: 




I worked on this pretty consistently for four months, not-so-cleverly beginning a month before the wedding. The edging, while gorgeous, was grueling: it's patterned on every row and is almost impossible to memorize. This was nicknamed the Hell Blanket before it was done, but once blocked it sat there looking so pretty and impressive that all was forgiven. And they loved it :D

March 9, 2016

A new sense of pride

Yesterday I finished another Mini Med School series. I attended all six lectures this year, in spite of pain and overwhelming fatigue. We receive certificates at the end, given with the joke that we can frame them. In previous years they had only served as a reminder of how much I've lost to illness so I filed them out of sight. 

But this winter I began to see these certificates with new eyes: I worked tremendously hard to earn them. The merit lies in what I overcame, not in what was achieved.  I refuse to let illness crush me and this is proof.


I will be framing and hanging this year's "diploma" near the others from 2013 and 2015. They demonstrate that the seemingly mundane can be remarkable.
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